Letter 11 - Ready or not

 Hello 2021,

I'm already at that time of the year when my finger Maths is coming in handy. So, if this is letter 11 it means that I can count the number of remaining days with my hands ne? Countdown vibes. Yaaaas!

We call hide and seek uNdize? (Should I come?) where I come from. Growing up, we played uNdize in isiXhosa or in Sesotho. I preferred the Sesotho version. Mainly because you could give a number one had to count to. Then you had enough time to run and hide. Despite being a fast runner, I wasn't good at hiding. So this bought me time. Fun times I tell you.

I can't remember when I last played in a game with others. Once adulting comes knocking, you realise that one of the fine prints is constantly playing hide and seek with your problems. Ku tricky. Ku tense. Ku wow!

2021, you've definitely been a "ready or not, here I come" type of girl. I'm sure you get the "hide" part of it all. There were days when I've just felt like hiding. There were days when I had to adult and couldn't. Then there were those blissful days when I successfully managed to hide. There were times when I thought hiding meant weakness. Not this year. I found strength on days when I just let the world be.

Your timeline made introspect on the "seeķ" element of it all. What exactly do we "seek" when we feel like hiding? I didn't like my initial answer. Worked on it to a point that when I asked myself again...I was at peace. At the end of the day, that's all that matters.

When I first played hide and seek, I used to be bothered that I wasn't too good at hiding or finding everyone. Until it hit me: technically you only need to stress about finding one person. The rest of them are just potential hiding spots for later on. Confronting our problems as adults isn't so different from this now, is it?

You've recycled this lesson over and over 2021. Danko mogirl. I get it now. Problems will come whether I'm ready or not. Where I choose to hide and what I choose to seek should keep me afloat until the next problem comes...