Dear 2018,
Today I bid you farewell.
On the last day of each year, my mind always plays mind tricks on me. The “this year, next year and last year” confusion when referencing events begins to kick in hard. I don’t think that your day 365 will any different.
As a child, the thought of a “time jump” fascinated me. One of my neighbours sparked this. “Can one eat food last year and finish it next year?” I actually thought about this the first time I heard it. “Yes, I had my food last night and finished it this morning,” he said with a smirk. We cracked so hard and made him repeat it over and over. I tried it on my mother and she said yes immediately. I cracked.
In recent years, I’ve been rather pessimistic about the last day of the year hype. Maybe pessimistic is a strong word. Let me say, I’m not moved. Why do we get so excited as if we will go on a time break? Yes, I get the fact that we’re starting over but it’s really just a continuation. I’m opening a door to another cycle. I’m getting onto another treadmill. I’m entering an unknown territory…Recently, a friend and I were even wondering why it’s “Happy New year”.
So, on your last day, I refused to be caught up in this hype of treating you as if you’re already gone. No. I’ll be present until your very last hour. You deserve that much respect, right?
They say that goodbye is one of the hardest phrases to say. They are right. I’ve had to say a couple of those this year. I’ve fortunately skipped some. They happened telephonically. Then there were others that I’ve had to sit through. I reminisced on the good time, made sure there was comfort food around and I wished them well. What is great about goodbye is the deep appreciation of hello, the blessing of having been touched by a soul and the awesome memories which you will carry forever. I guess this is why we get so angry when we don’t get to say goodbye to our loved ones before they die. We feel robbed of the opportunity to express this. In Africa, we say that “I am because you are”. This is true. Each and every person's personality and being is made up of encounters and interactions.
2018, today I’ll sleep, wake up and you will be no more. I’m saying goodbye. I won’t miss you. There’s no reason for me to miss you. I’ll carry your scars and treasure your memories like a long lost friend that I’ll never see again. Thank you for each and every moment.
Oh, and 2018, above it all…thank you for life and her lessons.
Farewell!
Linda
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