Letter 21/24: This and That

 Good morning 2024, 

It’s a Monday and I don’t care. Want to know why? It feels like a Saturday 🤣

I’ve been meaning to have this reflection for a while but, I’ve been postponing it. Not because I’m conflicted. No. I’ve been postponing it because once it’s out there, I won’t be able to take it back. 

Your timeline has made me more aware of how Adulthood is the place where certain conversations are just on permanent mute. This happens with those situations whereby something can only be “This”. It can only be “This” because it has always been. Everyone “thinks” it should be “This”. It can never be “That”. How dare you even bring up thqt possibility. A lot of things fit into this category but, let me touch on one. 

Being a village girl, I was born into the tradition of “imigidi” (gatherings). They are an integral part of how we do things. Part of our ultimate “This”. Growing up, I never had the vocabulary to describe my discomfort with them. Mainly because they are our “This”. Fast forward to adulting and wow! Homegirl is aware she tends to have social anxiety and this was her ultimate “aha” moment. There’s my “That”.  I’ve expressed my level of discomfort with imigidi in my safe spaces but, I would never dare to bring it up with the actual powers that be. When my uncles found out about one of my allergies they asked my dad if I had missed a ritual or anything due to me as a Xhosa child. Yeep 🤣

This and That can coexist. Right? 

So, yeah. There it is. Hi, my name is Linda. I’m a Xhosa hun who isn’t a fan of imigidi. I could list my reasons but, today I’m only brave enough to say this out loud…🙆🏾‍♀️